Different Perspective

Author: Tony Trott

Here we are almost in October, which, if you live under a rock and don’t know, is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I thought it might be a good idea to offer a different perspective; one that I haven’t heard tons about (I’m sure there are plenty of blogs/columns/articles from the husband’s perspective but they probably just get missed because Breast Cancer Awareness Month is filled, and rightly so, with stories of survivors of the awful disease).

My wife, Sheri, is an over 10-year survivor; and that just blows my mind when I think about it. I mean, it’s not like she has it simple enough with day-to-day things (because of her quadriplegia), but to add what can be a truly devastating disease to the picture seems to be just totally unfair (to put it mildly!).

When she was first diagnosed with breast cancer, I was pretty taken-aback, but I had no doubt that we would be able to deal with it. I’m using the pronoun “we” because sometimes the effects of a breast cancer diagnosis can easily affect more than just the person diagnosed. Of course, the woman bears the brunt of the diagnosis, but the man needs to be ever-present and offer support in decisions regarding treatment (please note that I said “offer support;” the final decision about treatment should always be up to the woman herself). There can be chemotherapy, radiation, a mastectomy (single or double), or any combination of the three. In Sheri’s case chemotherapy and radiation presented potentially life-threatening side-effects, so a mastectomy was really the only option.

Surgery was scheduled, and Sheri’s surgeon, who knew her well from previous hospitalizations and surgeries related to her spinal cord injury, referred to her as “my fragile creature.” So, we were both comfortable that Sheri was in good hands and things would go well. They did, and after an overnight precautionary stay at the hospital, she came home for the recovery.

Recovery from the mastectomy, not exactly recovery from breast cancer. Breast cancer is a disease; and, quite frankly, it is not something that is ever completely gone and you are completely recovered from.

As with other types of cancer, like the Non-Hodgkin’s B-Cell Lymphoma I was diagnosed with about 2 years ago, breast cancer is just something Sheri lives with from day to day and she is definitely a “survivor.” Is it totally gone after the mastectomy? No, it isn’t; but is it in charge of her life? That’s an emphatic NO!